Arranging a Funeral

The period following the death of a loved one is traumatic and you mustn’t feel rushed into making funeral arrangements.

Many people find it difficult to think about funeral arrangements in the immediate aftermath of a death in the family. Allow yourself time to absorb the enormity of your loss before concerning yourself with practicalities.

Remember that the timing of the funeral is entirely up to you. There is a misconception that there are only a few days in which to arrange a funeral. In fact, delayed ceremonies have grown increasingly common in recent years.

At Te Awahou Funerals, we encourage grieving families to take time to consider the funeral arrangements carefully. It is advisable to contact a funeral director as soon as possible after a death occurs, but detailed arrangements can be delayed until you feel able to make them.

The funeral occupies an important place in the grieving process and the time taken to ensure that the arrangements are well organised and appropriate is well spent. What seems like a good idea immediately following your loved one’s passing may give way to a better idea or a more suitable tribute, upon reflection.

Arrangements prior to a funeral take some time to coordinate. Mourners may have to travel from interstate or overseas and it can take time to compose fitting eulogies. By delaying the funeral just long enough to ensure that all details are carried out correctly, you may later find comfort in a final farewell that is both personal and appropriate.

During this period, family members can take comfort from the fact that their loved one will be treated with care and dignity until laid to rest.

Following the passing of a Loved one, there are a number of people that you will need to notify. Our funeral directors will assist in guiding you through this process.

Preparing to Meet with a Funeral Director

Arranging a Funeral Service or Memorial Service for your loved one is a confronting and often emotionally draining process. At Te Awahou Funerals, we work through it with you slowly and supportively, giving you time to process and work out the finer details.

We encourage you to read this section with your family so that each of you may share your thoughts and ideas for the funeral. By inviting everyone, including children, to help plan or take part in the service, you show them that their feelings matter.

This is a time to be understanding of each other’s needs. You are each experiencing grief and loss in your own way-be gentle with each other. Accept each other’s feelings and use this opportunity to share them.  You may face the challenge of balancing your loved one’s dying wishes with your own needs as mourners. Know that it is okay to put the needs of your family first. Seek to fulfil the essence of your loved one’s wishes, rather than the specific details.

Allow yourself time

You may feel that you need to put the funeral behind you as quickly as possible. If so, we encourage you to rethink that approach. Sometimes, families see the funeral as a painful experience and simply want it to be over. It helps to understand that the loss of our loved one has caused our pain; the funeral can and should be the instigator of our healing. In deciding on a day and time for the ceremony, be sure you have allowed enough time to consider and carry out all your preferred options.

Considerations that may require additional time

  • Relatives needing to travel
  • Opportunities to view your loved one
  • Preparing service sheets
  • Preparing memory displays
  • Compiling a photo story
  • Preparing the eulogy

Information Required by Law

When a death occurs, there is a legal obligation to register the death with the Registrar of Births, Deaths and Marriages in that state. The Registrar asks for information as part of the process of registering the death and it is an essential step in the funeral arrangement that this information is available for the funeral director to record.

Information to assemble before meeting to discuss arrangements:

  • Date of birth and birthplace of the deceased
  • Marriage details-where, when and to whom
  • Children(s) names and ages

  • Parents’ full name and occupations